Just Breathe

I finally made it to yoga yesterday! A friend had told me that as a newbie to the form and in need of something relaxing, I might want to try a type of yoga called anusara. I have no doubt that she was right, but I’m cheap, and rather than going to a yoga studio–of which there is no shortage in this area–I opted for one of the freebie classes offered by my gym.

Sure enough, I was the only newbie in the class. I hesitantly raised my hand in the back of the room when the instructor asked if anyone was new to yoga. I hate, HATE the first time in any gym class, and especially hate having the instructor’s eyes “specially” on me. I think most of you know that I don’t like not being good at things….and I especially don’t like being singled out for not being good at something. But I’m also too proud to leave without finishing something, so stay–and sweat–I did.

That’s because the first words out of the instructor’s mouth were, “I teach a power yoga class, so those of you who are new may not be able to follow every move.” Ugh. Was my pride really that important? Didn’t I want to slink out of the room right then and there?

Yup, and yup.

But I stayed, and got a great workout. I couldn’t do every move (hello, what is the one where you go down from a plank to hold yourself up on your forearms? Good God.), but I did most of them and surprisingly, was not the most inflexible person in the room (which was decidedly not the case when Liz and I attempted yoga on our Mexican holiday last year).  

But more than anything, as my friend had promised, I didn’t think about anything other than the exercise, the poses and my breathing during that hour. I was finally present–something that comes difficult to me, even having been off work for two weeks now.

That focus was particularly important this week, as I’m in a state of limbo. As it turns out, my doctors now think it might be a better idea for me to have radioactive iodine–yes, involving the aforementioned hateful low-iodine diet–before pursuing surgery, as it’s likely I’ll need the RAI either way. But with the long weekend and crazy schedules on my doctors’ parts, I’ve yet to get a final answer from them.

I’m honestly fine either way–I just want the cancer gone, and I trust my medical team implicitly. So I wait, but while I wait, my mind wanders, and I sometimes need to be brought back to the here and now.

So power yoga, anusara yoga, or something different–I’ll be back. And maybe I’ll be a little less sore after the next class!


2 thoughts on “Just Breathe

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