Right Now

 

It’s been a long time since I wrote a “right now” post, probably because I’ve been so caught up in – and let’s be honest, behind on – what I’m supposed to be doing. But I love reading what other people are up to, so here’s a look inside and around my four walls right now.

[framing] the flag that flew over the Capitol on my grandfather’s 90th birthday.

[reading] lots more now that I deleted Facebook from my phone. I’m not going cold turkey on FB – still have it up all day at work and read on my computer at home at other times – but this has put an end to what had become way too much mindless checking and scrolling, and now I’m using short bursts of time when I used to read FB to read using my Kindle and Nook apps (does anyone still use the Nook or am I alone?). I’ve got Still Life With Bread Crumbs (yay, Anna!) going in my Nook app, a real-life paper version (with autograph!) of Furiously Happy next to my bed, and yet another parenting guide in How to Talk So Your Kids Will Listen and Listen So Your Kids Will Talk in my work tote and downstairs at night.

[listening] to new podcasts, and catching up on past episodes of others. I’ve added 25% Friends, a new podcast from Sarah Bagley; Chasing Creative and Ann Kroeger, Writing Coach on writing and creativity; and Stuff Mom Never Told You to my feed, and I’m still loving The Girls Next Door, Matrimoney, Edit Your Life, The Mom Hour, Happier, and, of course, One Bad Mother.

[eyeing] baseball schedules. The Sox are going to be in Baltimore only for one measly quasi-weekend day (Memorial Day) all season, which means we either have to plan a baseball trip or that may be our only shot at seeing them this year, after not seeing them at all last year. I also got excited about the prospect of a midweek day date (sans kids and their incessant requests for snacks) to a Nationals game, only to find out that there’s exactly ONE game all season that fits the bill. Planning now for July…

[dropping] my rings off at the jeweler to have my ever-spinning engagement ring resized (and cleaned, please!) and a replacement stone set in my anniversary band. I stopped wearing the anniversary band as soon as I saw the stone missing and my hand feels naked without it. Speaking of…

[reserving] restaurant seats in mid-March to celebrate our 14^th anniversary of when we met. 14 years. We were babies.

[hoping] March is kinder to me this year than last (and many years past).

[ordering] groceries online. Instacart has changed my life. Online grocery shopping, with delivery at a time of my choosing? Yes, please. We’re only using it for some of our stuff – still buying most at Costco – but avoiding the big, crowded, nasty Giant on the weekend has improved my quality of life immeasurably.

[awaiting] my next Stitch Fix. Always. This month I’m asking for a denim jacket, some brightly colored jeans, and a new dress or skirt for work, as mine have all seen better days. I’m also going to try to step up my blogging game by using our manual camera for the pictures…so don’t be surprised if it takes me a while longer to get the next post put together.

[listing] five good things that I’m thankful for every night.

[planning] for our next renter. When we moved to DC, we rented our condo to quite possibly the nicest guy ever, and three years later, we’re so sorry to see him move on. Time to spruce up the place and get it ready for new people who will love it like their own (we hope).

A look back at what was happening around now in:

2015: Counting down to the end of maternity leave

2014: Feeling grateful for my breastfeeding support group

2013: Reflecting on mom guilt

2012: Thinking back to my first radioactive iodine treatment, four years earlier

2011: Planning for grad school graduation

What’s happening right now in your house?

2016 Intentions

Hey, would you look at that. It’s 2016. In fact, it’s been 2016 for some time now. I was “intending” to write this post at, say, the beginning of the year. But like Gretchen Rubin, who’s come around to the idea of sending Valentine’s Day cards instead of holiday cards, because that’s when she can get them done, here I am with my intentions for 2016. Because this is when I’ve gotten them done.

I’m using the word “intentions” intentionally. These aren’t resolutions or goals. I know it’s a difference of semantics, but there’s something about the setting of resolutions and goals that just sets me up to disappoint myself. I mean, it’s mid-February. How resolved can I possibly be?

(On a related note, since I’m starting this with 10.5 months left in the year, do I get to pro-rate my success? To be determined in the year-in-review post.)

Last year, I did set a word of the year. It was “present,” and I failed miserably. I didn’t do much living in the moment, I let my gratitude practice wither, and my monkey mind sped ahead to the to-do list of tomorrow, next week, next month all too often. But I’m giving myself a break on all of that. In many ways, 2015 was a great year, but as I wrote in December, it was filled with its fair share of bumps, too.

So, this year, no word. But maybe a theme. And the theme is: me. I fell into a mom rut last year, consumed by everything that needed to happen while juggling full-time work and the baby and the toddler. I became a cliché – no time to read and little time to write, no time to workout, no time to go out.

It’s time to break those habits. Because cliché is sad, but martyrdom is worse, and I don’t want to end up there. So, a few intentions for a less clichéd 2016:

I want to read. I think I read a grand total of two books last year, not counting the kid sleep books I read over and over again (to no avail). I’d especially love to read some fiction, which I feel like I’ve floated far away from. I miss escaping into a book, that feeling when you just can’t wait to find a free minute to open the pages back up (or turn the iPad back on). I’ve already made a little progress on this point, in part by deleting Facebook from my phone. Time when I used to mindlessly scroll is now taken up with a few quick pages, which has helped me already to read Jessica Turner’s The Fringe Hours, on finding more time in your day (how meta is that?), and My Other Ex, an anthology about women’s friendships.

Other books on my reading list right now that I’d love to get through this year:

• Anna Quindlen’s Still Life With Bread Crumbs (I started this, um, two years ago. An Anna book that I haven’t finished?!? You can tell by that very fact that reading took a nose dive for me.)
• Big Magic, by Elizabeth Gilbert
• Better Than Before, by Gretchen Rubin
• In the Unlikely Event, by Judy Blume
• Kindness Wins, by Galit Breen
• Furiously Happy, by Jenny Lawson (the Bloggess)
• Rising Strong, by Brene Brown
• When Breath Becomes Air, by Paul Kalanithi
• Yes, Please, by Amy Poehler

If I even get through half of those, I’ll call it a win.

What books are on your nightstand, in your Kindle, or on your library waiting list?

I want to write. Writing makes me happy. But finding the time to sketch out a piece, edit it, and send it out into the world has been tough, of late. I spent a chunk of January taking a class on finding balance as a writer, and carving out time to create. I came up with some good ideas – and then fell horribly behind when the snow hit. I’m committed to finishing the class, and then to actually following through on my plans for making time to write on a more regular basis. The things that make my heart sing shouldn’t be last on my to-do list.

I want to work out. Isn’t this on everyone’s list? But at some point this year, for the first time in more than FOUR years, I will be neither pregnant nor breastfeeding. My body will be back to being mine, and it’s time I stop treating it like a garbage heap. I’ve coasted on nursing to help burn calories since Katie was born 15 months ago, but now it’s time to actually get back to some physical fitness if I’m going to be able to justify dessert. I’ve started barre classes once a week, and I’m aiming to run on the treadmill two other times a week. I’d even like to run a 5k this year. In the fall. Maybe. (It would be my first race in almost five years!)

I want to dress up. Stitch Fix has revitalized my wardrobe far more than the several pieces I’ve kept from the styling service alone would show. I hate spending money on clothes, a fact that my closet made painfully obvious when I took inventory back in the fall. But spending a bit on some good pieces turns out to be worth it for mind and body alike. I’m sticking with Stitch Fix. My next box arrives March 9!

I want to get out, and get away. Babysitters are expensive, and it’s hard for one parent to take care of both kids for a whole weekend. But there’s value in investing in date nights that require clothes other than yoga pants and entertainment other than Netflix, and in B getting some solo time with Teddy and Katie while I return to my annual Girls’ Weekend. (That’s right, ladies, Michele’s back! Look out, New Hampshire!)

I want to get back to gratitude. I kept up my monthly(ish) Three Good Things posts last year, but I found it easier to find things I’d loved and learned than those I’d felt grateful for. I think that’s because I stopped looking as intentionally for the good. This year, I want to get back to listing five things I’m grateful for each day. It’s a lesson I’ve learned over and over again: the more I look for the good, the more good I find.

What do you intend to do this year, and what have you already accomplished? I’ll be back in a few months to let you know how my intentions are working out.

Three Good Things [02.09.16]

Holidays, sick days, snow days — they all combined to throw the second half of January wildly off track. But we’re back to a five-day work week (this week, at least), the colds are gone (for now), and the snow that was potentially in the forecast for today didn’t materialize (in my back yard). Let’s count up our good things.

Three things I’ve loved lately: 

• The HerStories Balanced Writer writing class. Almost five years after finishing grad school and running as fast as I could away from classes, I signed up for one. But this one was a pure treat, part of my plan this year to invest more in myself and my writing (see as-yet-unwritten-and-also-ridiculously-late post on my 2016 intentions for more on that). Part of doing more writing is finding the time to actually write more. So this class was less about crafting a perfect personal essay (though I hope to take a class or two on that, soon!) and more about looking at my endless to-do list and figuring out how I can make writing – and by extension, me – a higher priority on it. Judging by the fact that the back-to-back sicknesses and snow days derailed my work on the class, it’s safe to say that a) I needed the class; and b) it’s all still a work in progress, but I loved the intentionality that the class brought to how I approach my writing. First step: getting up from my desk for lunch at least once a week to read or work on a piece of writing at a nearby coffee shop. I even bought myself a new laptop sleeve so I can bring my laptop to and from work more easily. Now, will I hold myself to it?

• A Friday Night Lights reunion!?! No, it’s not the long-hoped for movie (which appears to be dead in the water), but the Austin ATX Television Festival is hosting a reunion 10 years after the show’s start. I do love Austin (and Riggins and Coach and Landry, but not Lyla or Becky). Wonder if there’s any way for me to be there…

• Barre. I went into a gym (of sorts) and didn’t get struck by lightning! It’s been a long four years without any kind of regular workout routine, and it’s time to get back in the game (see, also, above-mentioned intentions post). I’m planning to get back to running, but I need something else to rediscover the muscle tone that’s gone missing. Enter barre, a Pilates- and ballet-inspired strength training class. I bought and signed up for a bunch of classes and enlisted a friend to go with me, knowing that investing the money and making a commitment to a workout buddy would get my butt off the couch when all I really want to do is watch HGTV. I freaking love it – not only the class itself, but that I have a dedicated time for something that’s good for me every week. And someday, when I find my missing muscle tone, my legs will like it too.

Three things I’ve learned:

• How generations get their names. This showed up in my Facebook feed a day after I remembered that millennials used to be called Generation Y. I especially appreciated that it attempts to name MY sub-generation, which bridges Gen X and the Millennials. I never fit neatly into those BuzzFeed quizzes. The Atlantic suggests “Generation Catalano,” after My So-Called Life. YUP. Because Jared Leto and Claire Danes will always be Jordan Catalano and Angela Chase first.

• Yay for sarcasm! Hmm, I wonder why stories about how awesome sarcastic people keep appearing in my feeds? It couldn’t be that these damn algorithms are on to me, could it? According to these, we (we being the cuttingly sarcastic) are successful, creative, and have good brain health. Obviously. We are also disproportionately from the north (yup), appreciate people who both tolerate our smart-ass comments and lob them back (yup), and are sometimes seen as playful but also hostile (whoops, yup). This explains a lot.

• Metallica’s James Hetfield just got his Ph.D in astrophysics. Um, what? The guy who I used to watch on Headbangers’ Ball on Saturday nights? There’s some sort of Enter Sandman reference to be made here, but maybe I’d need a doctorate to put my finger on it.

Three things I’ve been grateful for:

• A flexible job. Between sick days and snow days (and some that overlapped), the last two weeks of January were brutal on our schedule. School and daycare may have closed, but work didn’t – which meant that I was up early, editing late, and trying to cram in conference calls during nap time. Not the vision of hot-cocoa-and-movie-filled, idealized snow days of my imagination. I complained about it then – and I’ll complain about it again when the next robo call announcing a school closure comes – but I’m grateful to have a job that enables me to work from home and at odd hours to make up the time, and a team that understands that sometimes snotty noses and playing in the snow have to come first.

• Adele. Katie hates her carseat. Actually, she hates being restrained in any shape or form, but especially in seats. This fact makes the otherwise-quick trip to and from daycare just as delightful as you’d imagine. It turns out, however, that my girl, like so many of us, has a sweet spot for Adele. Cue “Hello” at full volume, on repeat. People who see me rocking out as I roll to a stop in the next lane over: I have no shame if it means my kid isn’t screaming. And if she’s still screaming, I need the music even more.

• The moon shot to cure cancer. I know curing cancer isn’t a one-size-fits-all event, and it won’t happen during a press availability with the Vice President. But I appreciate that the President took time out of the State of the Union, with Joe Biden, still grieving the loss of his son, right behind him, to bear witness to the hardship and sorrow that cancer has brought to every family I know. Including mine, too much. I appreciate that Joe Biden is committed to making curing cancer a priority – not just now, in the last year of this administration, but for the rest of his days. And I appreciate the many, many advances that are already happening in the field of cancer research. But we can do more – so, so much more – especially for kids, and for people with metastatic cancer. Let’s do it.

What have you loved, learned, and felt grateful for lately?

 

Stitch Fix Review #4 – February 2016

And, we’re back. I took January off from Stitch Fix, since I’d had three boxes in a row, had done a fair amount of shopping on the side that revitalized my closet even more than what came in my Fixes, and, well, Christmas. I’d originally slated my February box to come late in the month, but then I got some referral credit and Stitch Fix refunded my purchase of my beloved olive Anita skinny pants that I got in my November fix because some of the stitches had started to pull. (Yes, a more enterprising person than I could have fixed the stitches or had the pants repaired, but I know myself, and those pants would have sat on a shelf in my closet until next summer. Also, great customer service, taking the pants back immediately.)

So, I had two *really good* reasons to bump my delivery date back to the first week of February. And then, bonus – my fix shipped early! Even after a slight shipping hiccup – in which I panicked that it was lost forever – it still arrived two days early. Oh, the joy when I see the teal Stitch Fix logo. Pure happiness, I tell you.

A quick review on how Stitch Fix works: You fill out an online style profile, based on which a stylist chooses five items (clothes, jewelry, and/or accessories) to send. You pay a $20 styling fee, which covers the cost of the stylist and shipping, and if you keep anything, you apply the $20 toward the cost of the item(s). If you keep all five, you get a 25% discount on the whole box! (You send whatever you don’t want back in a pre-paid envelope.) 

You can read my reviews of my earlier Fixes here.

This month I requested some great ankle-length, dark rinse jeans with a price point of under $100 (because there are some *really* expensive brands out there), a pair of pants to replace my Anita skinnies and some layering pieces, along with my consistent plea for petites and bright colors. Did my Fix deliver?

I already knew there would be color in the box, having peeked at my fix once it shipped (the big upside of the Stitch Fix app is that you can see pictures of some of the items). But I was even more excited when I opened the box and saw not just vibrant color but also tags with petite sizes on them. And the note from my stylist was the best and most personal one that I’ve received yet (hi, Shelby!):

On to the fashion show.

Skies Are Blue Meggen Scoop Neck Blouse ($58)

Oh, this color. It is EXACTLY what I meant when I asked for bright colors. And the sizing was just right in the shoulders, the neckline, and the length…which made it frustrating that the sleeves were too long and unfitted when the tabs were rolled down (but yet a little too tight when rolled up). “I think you can do better,” my sister told me. I agree.

Verdict: Returned.

Market and Spruce Fulton V-Neck Short Sleeve Knit Shirt ($68)

I was skeptical about this sweater when I saw it in the app pictures and even less excited taking it out of the box. (I was really hoping for a cardigan or crewneck sweater that I could layer to take me through the rest of the winter and into the spring.) Shelby noted that this isn’t a petite but that she thought it might work as a longer tunic style sweater with leggings. But the problem here isn’t the length, but the too-wide v-neck and too baggy arms. It’s like a dolman without the cute dolman fit across the middle. Into the return envelope it goes.

Verdict: Returned.

Just Black Adorra Skinny Jean ($88)

I asked for ankle-length, dark rinse jeans under $100. Check, check, check. Softest jeans I’ve ever put on, and no cuffing at the ankle necessary. These are keepers, enough said. I’ll be requesting more of these in brighter colors for the spring.

Verdict: Keeping!

Liverpool Hanna Skinny Pant ($88)

More Liverpool petite pants for the win. These are the replacement pants for my gone, but not forgotten, olive skinnies. They’re basically the same pants, in a different pattern. Same great fit! And I think this pattern will transition into spring better than the olive ones would have, so all in all, I’m happy. (Styled here with an H&M top and my Zad necklace from Fix #1.)

Verdict: Keeping!

Urban Expressions Avery Zipper Detail Hobo Bag ($68)

My bag situation is about where my closet was a few months back. When the strap on my hideous pump bag that I carried to work broke with only a couple of months left of pumping, I started carrying a diaper bag to work instead. (A cute looking Petunia Pickle Bottom bag, but a diaper bag nonetheless.) I stopped pumping in October. I am STILL carrying the diaper bag as my work tote. Meanwhile, I carry a Patriots diaper bag on the weekend. I mean, I’m proud to show support for the Pats, but I can’t say it’s high fashion. And my date night/going out bags are old, small Target holdovers – not a cute clutch to be seen. So, I’d pinned a few larger satchels and a couple of clutches in the last month, which inspired Shelby to send me the Avery bag. I see where she was going – this bag is big, has lots of pockets for organization, a cute lining, and a crossbody strap that would make it easier to carry with kids in tow. But yeah, the tassels – nope. So not me. I could take the ones off the zippers but not off the handle. Here’s hoping there’s a more classic version of this one in the Stitch Fix inventory for a future box.

Verdict: Returned.

The final tally: 2/5. I’m excited for more pants that fit well, but I’m ready to get some tops that work, too. Maybe in March?

Disclaimer: This post isn’t sponsored by Stitch Fix, and I pay for whatever I keep. But if you’re interested in trying Stitch Fix and you sign up using my referral link, I’ll receive a small credit to use toward future purchases. Thanks!

And, if you’re like me and can’t get enough of Stitch Fix reviews, visit the Stitch Fix review link up hosted by Maria from Kinder Craze and Crazy Together.